#ImwithHueys: editor shakes his head at the results of Helmsman Twitter poll

Last week a travesty occurred. Fast-food joint Back Yard Burgers beat out a true Memphis staple, Huey’s, on The Daily Helmsman’s Twitter poll for best burgers around campus. It was a very close race, with “BYB†scoring 53 percent to Huey’s 47 of 220 total votes, and I find myself asking one important question: “How did we get here?â€

So how did we get here? I recall fellow managing editor Mitchell Koch’s explanation of Back Yard Burger’s participation in the Twitter poll: “Y’know, just to have another option.†Back Yard Burger started off as a joke. No one, at first, took Back Yard Burger seriously in this competition. Next to Huey’s, R.P. Tracks, Ubee’s, Newby’s, Top’s Bar-B-Q (seriously Twitter!?) Mac’s Burgers and Half Shell, Back Yard Burger did not belong.

Back Yard Burger was this outside option that was interesting to watch, but as Back Yard Burger’s poll numbers grew an alarming situation came to light. Somehow, someway, Back Yard Burger’s supporters rallied behind the restaurant and Back Yard Burger became the “Best Burger nominee†for The Daily Helmsman’s Twitter poll.

So here we are. Back Yard Burger’s popularity beat out a Memphis restaurant with years and years of experience - a restaurant truly qualified for the prestigious position of The Daily Helmsman’s Twitter followers’ favorite burger around campus. I mean, this is The Daily Helmsman’s Twitter followers’ favorite burger around campus. It’s not amatuer hour. Just because the idea that Back Yard Burger would beat out these other actual-restaurants is entertaining doesn’t mean that we should have entertained that notion. Back Yard Burger isn’t a “maverick†and it won’t make burgers around campus great again.  

Look, Huey’s has been serving quality burgers with toasted sesame seed buns in the Bluff City since 1970. Meanwhile (for near the same price as an appetizing Madison Avenue Burger from Huey’s) Back Yard Burger will force a greasy, smushed-up hamburger in an uninspiring, brown bag on their customers. Back Yard Burger probably won’t even wait. Back Yard Burger thinks that since it’s a famous, fast-food brand that it can do anything that Back Yard Burger wants. That is despicable, Back Yard Burger.

Back Yard Burger just isn’t nearly as qualified as Huey’s. I think that’s obvious. Over the weekend I visited Back Yard Burger to see, for myself, what the hype was all about.

I noticed that on the drive-through menu (and this is true) that “Mushroom†was spelled “Musroom†on the “Musroom Swiss Burger†option. Musroom. Seriously, “Musroom Swiss Burger.†I don’t know how that happened, but it’s embarrassing. And yet, even with blatant signs that Back Yard Burger should not even come close to being The Daily Helmsman’s Twitter followers’ favorite place to get a burger around campus, Back Yard Burger beat out plenty of viable candidates.

How did we get here? There is no logical explanation. At this point we are faced with the reality that Back Yard Burger is indeed The Daily Helmsman’s Twitter followers’ favorite place to get a burger around campus. Twitter voted and that’s just that. Here we are. I’ll just have to wait until The Daily Helmsman nominates another place to get a burger around campus, and that could be a while. Maybe four years.

In the meantime, if you need me I’ll be at Huey’s. I’ll sit alone while everyone else is at Back Yard Burger with only my phone or a laptop as company. I’ll order a well-prepared Madison Avenue Burger, sip down a Ghost River, clear my head, and I don’t know… maybe check my e-mails.